Here's some Mangum to chew on...

...because the chances of you listening to a new Neutral Milk Hotel album anytime soon are about as big as the dot between these brackets: [ ] Yup, that big.



Love the live footage. Ten-year-old me probably wouldn't have known what to make of this.

(Via Pitchfork)

The War of Northern Aggression, Part 5: In Which Gen.'s John McClane and Robert E. Lee Have a Chat

After an 11-month hiatus in my educational series about the War Between the States through song, I have returned with yet another installment of ole-timey goodness. Beats book larnin', right?

Get your muskets cleaned and check yo hardtack for maggots, we got some fightin' to do!

Ready? Good. Let's do this.

(Note: the following may contain a few anachronisms.)



Hey Bobby Lee, I got somethin' for you.


I would hope that it is your declaration of surrender, good sir. How quaint of you to deliver it personally and not send a messenger!


No motherf***er! It's a goddamn Emancipation Proclamation. All your slaves are free now. They're on our side. You might as well give up now, graybeard, you're f***ed.


[scribbles something on piece of parchment]


You got something to say?


[holding up the note] Ah yes, I have just received this "Emancipation Unproclamation," the contents of which may interest you.


But YOU wrote that. Just now. I saw you, dumba**.


I'm afraid that you must be mistaken sir, it was delivered on horseback a moment ago.


I was right here the whole time, a**hole. I saw you with the pen and paper. You're not fooling anyone, you old piece of s***!


Well, perhaps you would like to read it.


[snatches paper out of Lee's hand, begins to read]

***The White House, Feb. 1, 1863

My dearest Confederate Army and Gov't,
r badd, all ur slavez r belong 2u. wuz kiddn b4

With the kindest of regards,
Abraham Lincoln

P.S. McClane, guess where your mother was last night.***


It seems that we're at a bit of an impasse, General McClane...


That does it. Yippee-ki-yay motherf***er! [coldcocks Lee, grabs rapier that's resting against the side of the tent and runs Lee through. McClane then pulls a loaded machine gun out of a chest and proceeds to mow down the entire Army of Northern Virginia.]

To be continued...

Hot Water Music - The End of the Line (From The New What Next)
Neutral Milk Hotel - Marching Theme (From On Avery Island)
The National - Start a War (From Boxer)

Buy 'em up:
Epitaph
Merge
Beggar's Banquet

The Halls are Decked, the Boughs are Hollied

I have a hard time believing that it's Christmas tomorrow, it certainly doesn't feel like it to me...and yet, I am surrounded by abundant reminders that it is indeed that time of the year once again. Thus, I will supply you a non-militaristic installment of music for the blog. I do have to say to my Jewish friends that I would have liked to put up a Hanukkah-themed post as well, but unfortunately I lack a sufficient number of relevant selections. Perhaps one day when my music collection has grown more voluminous I'll make up for this transgression.

So, here are some tunes. A merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, fun-filled Festivus, and joyous Kwanzaa to all, and to all a good night.

Casiotone For the Painfully Alone - Cold White Christmas (From Etiquette)
It's a downer, but it's awesome.

Neutral Milk Hotel - Two-Headed Boy (From In the Aeroplane Over the Sea)
It's a downer, and not really relevant until the very end, but still awesome.

"Weird Al" Yankovic - The Night Santa Went Crazy (From Greatest Hits, Vol. 2)
It's no "Amish Paradise," but when I was ten, the images of bloodshed, destruction, and venison this song evoked seemed pretty cool.

Sufjan Stevens - Sister Winter (From Peace: Vol. 5)
A song that slowly builds to an apex of holiday epicness, as only Sufjan can do it.

Zooey Deschanel & Leon Redbone - Baby, It's Cold Outside (From Elf: Music From The Major Motion Picture)
Elf is a mehhh film, but Zooey Deschanel has a very nice voice.

Modest Mouse - Jesus Christ Was an Only Child (From The Lonesome Crowded West)
Isaac Brock, putting the Christ back in Christmas!

Everclear - Santa Monica (From Sparkle and Fade)
Ok, this is a stretch. But a clever pun, no?

Buy 'em up:
Tomlab
Merge
Amazon.com (Because Scotti Bros. went belly-up years ago)
Asthmatic Kitty
Up Records
Capitol